There are times when what we are doing just isn’t working. You may be struggling with a relationship that feels as though you are not on the “same page.” You may have tried to get more sleep or be on time, perhaps exercise more or eat healthier. You have tried many times and it works for a day or two, then back to the old behavior and out the window the change goes!
Surrender is the first step, and then here are five concrete suggestions for making changes that stick:
- Commit to a time frame. My preference is 90 days, but if that is overwhelming, shorten it – 30 days, two weeks or even one week until your next counseling session.
- Practice the new behavior every day, consistently. It’s just like exercising a muscle – it gets stronger with repeated use.
- Keep it simple. Get a strong start and build from there.
- Be accountable. Make the commitment to your counselor or a partner who understands what you are working on and check in – often.
- Keep on. If you slip up, keep going. This is the ONLY way to break the all-or-nothing thinking. A slip is okay and may be part of your journey.
What change are you working on? Can you practice holding your tongue instead of criticizing your child’s appearance? Could you make a new commitment to stay with your food plan? How about improving your self-care?
Feel free to ask us about an accountability program. We are always happy to help.
This post was originally published on White Picket Fence Counseling Center in March 2012.